Hello everyone. My name is Michelle and I am an addict. A sugar addict. I have a major problem and I need serious help.
By now, if you are a regular reader of this blog, you probably think I'm goofing around. I'm not. It's serious time. I have struggled with my weight for years. I am currently carrying around 80 extra pounds. I'm only five foot one. I wear a size 16. I think I carry it pretty well. Most people are stunned when I tell them my actual weight. And while my brain thinks I carry the extra weight well, my body is saying, "Damn gurl! Put that chewy bar down!! My back is killing! My feet are sore! There's trouble in the stomach and colon!!!".
I have tried to kick sugar about fifty times. My record is three weeks, ending in an all out bender of ice cream (my greatest weakness), cookies and honey garlic chicken wings. Like any addict, I have some pretty bizarre logic. Many times I have solved the problem of tempting ice cream in the house, by eating the whole carton. Once it's gone and I can't be tempted by it any more. Every time I do this it seems to makes perfect sense. If there are no sweets in the house I will bake cookies from scratch just to satisfy the craving. Living out in the country doesn't remove temptation. I got me a car! I'll drive miles for an ice cream cone!
I'd love to know if there is a psychological reason, for me personally, for why I do this. Is there some mental reason why I just can't quit? Some trauma in my childhood? Nope. Am I terrified of being slim and attracting too much male attention? Hell no!
Seriously, I got nothing. I know that I tend to go on a bit of a bender when I fight with my spouse, but honestly, that is very rare. Certainly not enough to account for a habit of my magnitude.
I have often just claimed that I am weak. That I have no self control and that secretly I just didn't care about myself enough to use some restraint.
Not true. I happen to love myself. I like my face. I like my hair. I like what my body can do for me, if not its current shape. I'm strong! I can do some serious heavy lifting! I make gorgeous babies. I can swim, run, (if I have to), row, walk, bike. My body is pretty cool. I don't even mind my big butt, because it makes my waist look smaller!
I've learned that my problem with sugar isn't in my head, it's in my brain. Studies have shown that the brain reacts to sugar in the same way it reacts to cocaine and heroin.
Sugar lighting up the pleasure center of the brain, the same as cocaine.
COCAINE AND HEROIN!!!!! No wonder it's so hard to stop. And here's another problem. Cocaine and other hard drugs are kinda hard to come by for a middle aged suburban mom. Sugar in the other hand is everywhere!! It's in my breakfast cereal, my juice, the ketchup I put on my eggs, the jam for my toast, waffles and pancakes. Even my bacon is coated in sugar! And this is just breakfast!!!!
Sugar crash an hour later and I'm sucking back the Diet Coke. But get this, the aspartame in Diet Coke only makes me crave real sugar even more, so I follow it with 4 cookies. A friend is stopping by for coffee. Oh look! She brought doughnuts! Busy running around at lunch? Better hit the Timmies drive thru and grab a combo, with a doughnut and another Diet Coke. Afternoon snack? A chewy bar outta do. Dinner sounds healthy. Spaghetti with tomato sauce and salad. I never buy pre-made tomato sauce because it's loaded with sugar and, ya know, we don't want that. So I make my own. Wait a second! Those stewed tomatoes? They contain sugar. The Italian seasoning blend? Yep, sugar in there too. And the salad dressing? Well, they might as well call it "Sugar Sauce for Salads". Don't forget desert! Three scoops of vanilla ice cream with Skor bits and mini chocolate chips on it. And I'll wash it all down with another Diet Coke. Mmmmmmmmmm. I am salivating just writing about it! This is an average day.
My cravings for sugar first thing in the morning are unreal. I will have not one, not two, but three huge bowls of cereal in the morning if it's in the house. I'm not talking Golden Grahams or Fruit Loops either. I don't buy that stuff. I'm a Mini Wheats, Honey Nut Cheerios, Fiber One Honey Clusters kinda girl. These are all marketed as being healthy for you. Hilarious.
Even when I choose savory foods, I get the sugary ones. Chicken wings and other meats are always sweetened with some kind of sauce. Honey Garlic, BBQ, Steak Sauce, Ketchup. All just sugar sauce.
Here's the other problem sugar addicts face. Everyone is your drug dealer. No one would ever say to a heroin addict, except maybe another heroin addict, "Come on! It's your birthday! You can have a little on your birthday. It's all about moderation you know". I cannot tell you how many times I have heard this from family, friends, strangers, even my own husband, who knows all about my struggle, and still dangles the sugar coated gummie carrot in my face.
A sugar addiction is no more about moderation than any other addiction. I have never heard of a recovering alcoholic or drug addict who said, "Yeah, I still dabble a bit. You know, like on my birthday, or on like Saturday, because that's my cheat day". Gad! I wish you could see the look on my face as I write this, because this is the exact methodology that is used when someone is addicted to sugar. It's a real thing people! Withdrawal SUCKS! Trust me, I've done it about a dozen times.
I think that part of the problem with understanding the severity of this problem is that the symptoms of sugar addiction are not the same as those of other hard drug users. I don't look strung out and skeletal. I'm not dirty and red eyed.
Here are some signs of a sugar addiction you may not have noticed:
I'm very overweight. I'm 5'1" and a 190 pounds. That ain't good, and it isn't genetics either. I am perfectly capable of losing weight. I have weighed as low as 126 pounds in my adult life and been super healthy. Genetics means I will never be 105 pounds and scrawny like some other women in my family and that's just fine. I'm built different. However, carrying around significant extra weight is a good sign that something is amiss.
I drink a lot of soda. Now, I drink diet soda, which is no better than regular soda, it simply has the sugar replaced with artificial chemicals, Yum! But a lot of people with a sugar addiction drink a ton of soda. Pop isn't the only culprit in the glass. Sports drinks, juices, iced teas, energy drinks, yogurt beverages, chocolate milk, hot chocolate and flavored waters, including ones marketed as healthy, (I'm looking at you Vitamin Water), are full of sugar. None of us would take 12 teaspoons of sugar and pour it into a glass of water and drink it, but if your drinking a Coke that's exactly what you're doing. They may dress it up with bright colours, pretty labels and absurd health claims, but that's all it is. Sugar water.
Replacing sugary drinks with sugar free drinks, as I have done, is not the answer either. Studies have shown that people who drink diet soda gain more weight that then our regular soda drinking counterparts because when the body craves sugar and you give it aspartame instead, your brain does a, "wtf?? That wasn't sugar! GIVE ME SUGAR"!!!! And so you chase that diet coke with a pie. A whole frickin' pie.
Watch what people eat at a party. I always head for the taco dip first. Sounds safe you say? Wrong! Commercially made salsa has buckets of sugar in it. After that it's on to the sweets. Cookies, cake, little bite sized mini desserts. Mmmmmmmm. The one place you won't find me? The veggie and dip tray. I like veggies, I'm just trying to avoid the commercially made dip which, you guessed it, contains sugar. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
I get extremely cranky when I don't have sugar. Occasionally I'll get the shakes. Generally a full blown sugar withdrawal is an awful experience. Mind blowing headaches, unbelievable cravings and complete lethargy are a few of the worst things to overcome. Temptation is around every corner. For me it's best if I purge my house of all sugar before I start detoxing and then lock myself in the house for a week until it's over.
These are just a few things that you might notice in yourself or others that may indicate a problem with sugar.
Now, a lot of people will say that sugar isn't bad for you, just too much sugar is bad for you. Yes, thank you spokesman for the National Sugar Council. Chances are, if you can eat a bit of sugar every day and be just fine, then you are probably not a sugar addict. That being said, I would challenge you to eliminate all sugar, all of it, from your diet for only one week. See how hard that is, and how you feel physically. It will be eyeopening I guarantee it. You just may discover that you actually do have a problem, or at the very least, your eyes will be open to all the products you eat every day that contain added sugar.
A lot of people will also say, "you look fine" or, "love the skin you're in", or "big is beautiful". Well, in fact, the effects of sugar on my body mean that my skin is actually sallow and dry, and what's going on inside that skin is a bunch of aches and pains from carrying so much extra weight, a fatty liver, rising cholesterol and very likely pre-diabetes. There's nothing beautiful about that.
Here's the good news though. I am a stubborn person. Very stubborn. Just because I have tried and failed 50 times, does not mean that I won't try 50 more. As soon as I finish this post I am going to make out sugar detox plan and head to the grocery store. Tomorrow will be day 1 of that detox which will end 7 days later. I will let you know how it's going. I'm sure it will be great fun, for all of you. I, on the other hand, will probably be wanting to drive a spike through my head halfway through the week.
So wish me luck and remember, when you offer a person something sweet to eat and they say no thank you, don't harass them into eating it. Just say ok and move on. Don't be somebody's dealer!
Peace out
Michy
Here's the other problem sugar addicts face. Everyone is your drug dealer. No one would ever say to a heroin addict, except maybe another heroin addict, "Come on! It's your birthday! You can have a little on your birthday. It's all about moderation you know". I cannot tell you how many times I have heard this from family, friends, strangers, even my own husband, who knows all about my struggle, and still dangles the sugar coated gummie carrot in my face.
Yes, they exist!
A sugar addiction is no more about moderation than any other addiction. I have never heard of a recovering alcoholic or drug addict who said, "Yeah, I still dabble a bit. You know, like on my birthday, or on like Saturday, because that's my cheat day". Gad! I wish you could see the look on my face as I write this, because this is the exact methodology that is used when someone is addicted to sugar. It's a real thing people! Withdrawal SUCKS! Trust me, I've done it about a dozen times.
I think that part of the problem with understanding the severity of this problem is that the symptoms of sugar addiction are not the same as those of other hard drug users. I don't look strung out and skeletal. I'm not dirty and red eyed.
Here are some signs of a sugar addiction you may not have noticed:
I'm very overweight. I'm 5'1" and a 190 pounds. That ain't good, and it isn't genetics either. I am perfectly capable of losing weight. I have weighed as low as 126 pounds in my adult life and been super healthy. Genetics means I will never be 105 pounds and scrawny like some other women in my family and that's just fine. I'm built different. However, carrying around significant extra weight is a good sign that something is amiss.
I drink a lot of soda. Now, I drink diet soda, which is no better than regular soda, it simply has the sugar replaced with artificial chemicals, Yum! But a lot of people with a sugar addiction drink a ton of soda. Pop isn't the only culprit in the glass. Sports drinks, juices, iced teas, energy drinks, yogurt beverages, chocolate milk, hot chocolate and flavored waters, including ones marketed as healthy, (I'm looking at you Vitamin Water), are full of sugar. None of us would take 12 teaspoons of sugar and pour it into a glass of water and drink it, but if your drinking a Coke that's exactly what you're doing. They may dress it up with bright colours, pretty labels and absurd health claims, but that's all it is. Sugar water.
Replacing sugary drinks with sugar free drinks, as I have done, is not the answer either. Studies have shown that people who drink diet soda gain more weight that then our regular soda drinking counterparts because when the body craves sugar and you give it aspartame instead, your brain does a, "wtf?? That wasn't sugar! GIVE ME SUGAR"!!!! And so you chase that diet coke with a pie. A whole frickin' pie.
Watch what people eat at a party. I always head for the taco dip first. Sounds safe you say? Wrong! Commercially made salsa has buckets of sugar in it. After that it's on to the sweets. Cookies, cake, little bite sized mini desserts. Mmmmmmmm. The one place you won't find me? The veggie and dip tray. I like veggies, I'm just trying to avoid the commercially made dip which, you guessed it, contains sugar. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
I get extremely cranky when I don't have sugar. Occasionally I'll get the shakes. Generally a full blown sugar withdrawal is an awful experience. Mind blowing headaches, unbelievable cravings and complete lethargy are a few of the worst things to overcome. Temptation is around every corner. For me it's best if I purge my house of all sugar before I start detoxing and then lock myself in the house for a week until it's over.
These are just a few things that you might notice in yourself or others that may indicate a problem with sugar.
Now, a lot of people will say that sugar isn't bad for you, just too much sugar is bad for you. Yes, thank you spokesman for the National Sugar Council. Chances are, if you can eat a bit of sugar every day and be just fine, then you are probably not a sugar addict. That being said, I would challenge you to eliminate all sugar, all of it, from your diet for only one week. See how hard that is, and how you feel physically. It will be eyeopening I guarantee it. You just may discover that you actually do have a problem, or at the very least, your eyes will be open to all the products you eat every day that contain added sugar.
A lot of people will also say, "you look fine" or, "love the skin you're in", or "big is beautiful". Well, in fact, the effects of sugar on my body mean that my skin is actually sallow and dry, and what's going on inside that skin is a bunch of aches and pains from carrying so much extra weight, a fatty liver, rising cholesterol and very likely pre-diabetes. There's nothing beautiful about that.
Here's the good news though. I am a stubborn person. Very stubborn. Just because I have tried and failed 50 times, does not mean that I won't try 50 more. As soon as I finish this post I am going to make out sugar detox plan and head to the grocery store. Tomorrow will be day 1 of that detox which will end 7 days later. I will let you know how it's going. I'm sure it will be great fun, for all of you. I, on the other hand, will probably be wanting to drive a spike through my head halfway through the week.
So wish me luck and remember, when you offer a person something sweet to eat and they say no thank you, don't harass them into eating it. Just say ok and move on. Don't be somebody's dealer!
Peace out
Michy
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