Mom, Is There Any Reason Why Anyone Would Want to Have Sex?


Well, we all know it's coming.  That special chat between parents and children.  "The Birds and the Bees", "The Talk", call it what you will.  Most people don't want to even think about it.  The idea of explaining sex and puberty, and all of that, to young children, has parents racing to Chapters for the latest edition of "What's Happening to Me?" Ha!  You know it's true!

But not me, no sir.  I am prepared for this inevitable conversation!  I am willing to explain everything and anything my boys may want to know.  Everything from the basics, "How can I make this boner go away?", (quit playing with it), and "Why don't I have boobs"?. (because if you had your own you'd never talk to girls), to the more deep philosophical questions like, "How do I know if my girlfriend is a conniving, horny tramp"?, (they all are) and "How do I know if I'm ready to have sex?", (can you afford rent, insurance, food, clothing, furniture and a car because you ain't bringing no babies home to your mother)!   These, and all questions in between will be answered openly and directly.

So when Alex asked me the other night, why anyone would want to have sex, I immediately began to mentally prepare myself.

"Well, honey, yes I can think of some reasons, but why do you ask?"

"No reason.  I just don't know why anyone would want to do that."

Interesting . . . He's not getting off that easy.

"Well, where were you talking about sex"?

"Nowhere".

Uh huh.  Sure.

"Well did you see it on tv or something".

"No".

"Well honey, if you tell me what you heard, maybe I can explain it to you better".



So here's the low-down.  Alex was at a friends house for a sleepover and the two boys slept in the same bed.  Perfectly normal sleepover, I did it all the time when I was a kid.  Things took a turn for the goofy when, in typical boy behavior, his friend jumped on him and started humping him.  This may sound weird, but I know grown men who still do this to their friends.  Alex however is under the impression that he has just had sex.

How adorbs is that???  Kids!  They are too much!

Apparently he found the experience unsatisfactory, because he can't imagine why anyone would want to do that.  I explained to him that his friend was just being a goof and that they did not in fact have sex.  "To have sex", I said, "you need a man and a women".  After I said this I realized that in these modern times that is no longer true, but I wasn't going there yet.  "You also need to love each other very much because people have sex to make a baby, and if you're not ready to make a baby, you'd better keep yer pants on"!

So I thought, I'm getting off pretty easy here, but just to be sure I asked, "Do you want to know the gory details, or do you want to wait until your older?"

"Trust me Mom", he says, "I do not wanna know"!

Ha!  I guess I'm good for the next little while.  Feel free to share you Birds and Bees story in the comments section below!

Michy